Attaining Misery

The surest path to misery is trying to avoid pain at all cost.

Imagine your strongest drive is to avoid misery. Of course, it's not in your best interest to do something you know will hurt. For example, jumping off a cliff will definitely hurt!

Now imagine doing something that might cause pain, like approaching someone to meet them for the first time. Imagine being so bent on avoiding pain that you never even approach the other person. In this case, your drive to avoid pain ensures that you don't experience it.

However, we can often imagine pain that may never happen.

Assiduously avoiding (often imagined) pain brings collateral outcomes. For example, avoiding imagined pain leads to keeping your social network the same size (that is, NOT expanding it). Doing so has larger upstream implications! For example, what if the person you avoided meeting held the key to a job that fits you very well? By avoiding all pain at any cost, you've also succeeded in limiting your professional prospects!

Avoiding all pain at all costs is the surest way to cut off longer-term growth!