The Shadow

We all have a dark side. What are you going to do about yours?

All faults may be forgiven of him who has perfect candor.

Walt Whitman

Jung had a name for it-- "your shadow". It’s all your own personality aspects you keep from normal view. They’re the parts of you that you keep hidden (sometimes at high cost)-- even to yourself.

Everyone has a shadow. Shadows are necessary for civilization to even exist. There’s no way society could exist without people having egos. On the other hand, there are parts of a person’s ego that need to remain hidden. For example, being mean to others drives them away. No one would want to put up with your unfriendliness were you to display it!

Another good reason to hide certain personality aspects is that our conscious minds can pay attention to only so much We need to omit some things just to stay sane!

Many shadow attributes seem arbitrary. What can you do in this culture? What can’t you do in this culture? It's okay for me to do things, but maybe not so cool for someone else.

You don’t have to live out your shadow side, but you mustn't bury it either. The deeper you bury it, the more you’ll project it on other people—it has to go somewhere! By contrast, the more open you are about your shadow, the less time and energy you’ll spend trying to hide it. This means more time and energy to do the stuff you really want to do and to be the person you want to be.

As a civilization, we use things like scary stories and other ways to honor the shadow without having to live our shadows out. Honor your shadow, but don't live it out.